It's A Christmas Cracker! - Our Top 10 Christmas Cracker Jokes

Ever since late Victorian days, the concept of the Christmas cracker has changed little - the hat, toy, motto and, of course, the snap.


Perhaps increasingly the motto has slowly transformed to the dreaded Christmas joke. These 'jokes' are only to be consumed with a healthy dose of Christmas cheer (mulled wine or something stronger perhaps you're going to need it).

Don't forget and let us know your favourite cracker joke in the comments section below, we'd love to hear from you. 

1. Why was the turkey in the pop group?

Because he was the only one with drumsticks!

2. Why was the snowman looking through the carrots?

He was picking his nose

3. Two snowmen were standing in a field. One said, "Can you smell carrots?"

 4. What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

"It's Christmas Eve"

5. What is good King Wenceslas favourite pizza?

One that’s deep-pan, crisp and even

6. Why did no-one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay?

Because they were two deer

7. How did Mary and Joseph know that Jesus was 7lb 6oz when he was born?

They had a weigh in a manger

8. What do you call a blind reindeer?

No eye deer

9. How does Darth Vader enjoy his Christmas Turkey?

On the dark side!

10. What’s a dog’s favourite carol?

Bark, the herald angels sing

Despite the above, crackers have been a mainstay of Christmas for over 150 years. By the 1950s, the box lids had lost a lot their colourful vitality.

For the swinging '60s, a box of crackers from Tom Smith contained a full octave of pipes along with instructions.

tom Smith is thought to have been the first person to bring the idea of the modern Christmas cracker to England. In 1861 he gave the world his 'Bangs of Expectations' or as we call them today crackers. Although in hindsight, who wouldn't prefer a bang of expectation to a simple cracker? 


The world's longest Christmas cracker measured 207ft long and 13ft in diameter and was made by the parents of children at Ley Hill School and Pre-School, Chesham, Buckinghamshire, UK on 20 December 2001. 

The biggest Christmas cracker pull was done by 1,478 people at an event organised by Honda Japan at Tochigi Proving Ground, Tochigi, Japan, on 18 October 2009. Now that would be a bang of expectation. 

Don't forget and let us know your facvourite cracker joke in the comments section below, we'd love to hear from you. 


Let us know 

Header Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay 

Cracker Image Museum of Brands


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